SYF is finally over. I can't shake away that feeling of disappointment. But I feel relieved..

I failed, I really did. My mind wasn't functioning as it should, my fingers weren't listening to me. But what can I do now but let it go?

But I'm not good at letting go. I never was and never will be. Yet I never know how to cherish my chances, cherish my opportunities and cherish every moment I have. How contradictary.

I don't want to be emo. I've passed that stage. Now I just feel empty. It's like I've lost everything. Well.. Almost everything.

In the end, I still want to thank so many countless people for their well wishes, good lucks, encouragements, advice, help and so on... Seniors, juniors, friends.. There's just too many people to name. But I'm sorry if I let any of you down.

And I'm grateful, I appreciate it. Thank you.

We're all so busy tryin' to get ahead, got a pillow of fears when we go to bed,
we're never satisfied, 'the grass is greener on the other side'. We're so
distracted with the jealousy, forget it's in our hands to stop the agony, will
you ever be content, on your side of the fence.

Sometimes you can't help but feel like running away from everything. Just fly away to some deserted island at some deserted coast and live your remaining life peacefully. At this time, I want to just forget about this.

Well, it's useless whining and crying my hearts out in self-pity. I will be a happy person. To the best of my abilities, I'll wake up from this nightmare and get this over with once and for all. Even if I have to do it all alone, I will and I can make it..

A life "alone".. I wonder if I can survive. Heh.. This is too depressing. Smile.. I'll smile. I guess I can do it. Optimistic is a correct way of life.

I never really try to be positive, I'm too damn busy being negative, so focused on what I get, I never understood what it means to live.