cause lately i've

"For every two times you feel up there is twice the chance to feel down - 99/100騙しの哲 by UVERworld"



Alex [X]
Ayeshah [X]
Brandon [X]
Clarissa [X]
Clarisse [X]
Daniel [X]
Derrick [X]
Eileen [X]
Esther [X]
Eunice Lee [X]
Eunice Lim [X]
Genevieve [X]
Hui En [X]
Hui Jing [X]
Jarratt [X]
Jaycelyn [X]
Jia Hui [X]
Jia Min [X]
Jie Heng [X]
Kimberley [X]
Li Qin [X]
Marcus [X]
Muni [X]
Novia [X]
Pei Ying [X]
Shi Yuan [X]
Shu Ling [X]
Si Yin [X]
Song Jia [X]
Vivien [X]
Wee Shan [X]
Wei Qi [X]
Wei Qi (Dance)[X]
DHS1-2Iowa [X]
DHS3-4Gigabites [X]


March 2005
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layout tm / dd

Tuesday, April 28, 2009


8:36 PM

Yo darlings. I've officially moved to Livejournal.

If you're smart enough you'll be able to guess what my link is.

I believe you're all smart enough though. HAHA.

Monday, April 27, 2009


8:22 PM

I'm tired. so much tests to study, so much work to do.

When will I ever be good enough, to be that one unique person, just me and only me..

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Once again

8:03 PM

This blog will be opened once again..

At least for now (:

7:52 PM

SYF is finally over. I can't shake away that feeling of disappointment. But I feel relieved..

I failed, I really did. My mind wasn't functioning as it should, my fingers weren't listening to me. But what can I do now but let it go?

But I'm not good at letting go. I never was and never will be. Yet I never know how to cherish my chances, cherish my opportunities and cherish every moment I have. How contradictary.

I don't want to be emo. I've passed that stage. Now I just feel empty. It's like I've lost everything. Well.. Almost everything.

In the end, I still want to thank so many countless people for their well wishes, good lucks, encouragements, advice, help and so on... Seniors, juniors, friends.. There's just too many people to name. But I'm sorry if I let any of you down.

And I'm grateful, I appreciate it. Thank you.

We're all so busy tryin' to get ahead, got a pillow of fears when we go to bed,
we're never satisfied, 'the grass is greener on the other side'. We're so
distracted with the jealousy, forget it's in our hands to stop the agony, will
you ever be content, on your side of the fence.

Sometimes you can't help but feel like running away from everything. Just fly away to some deserted island at some deserted coast and live your remaining life peacefully. At this time, I want to just forget about this.

Well, it's useless whining and crying my hearts out in self-pity. I will be a happy person. To the best of my abilities, I'll wake up from this nightmare and get this over with once and for all. Even if I have to do it all alone, I will and I can make it..

A life "alone".. I wonder if I can survive. Heh.. This is too depressing. Smile.. I'll smile. I guess I can do it. Optimistic is a correct way of life.

I never really try to be positive, I'm too damn busy being negative, so focused on what I get, I never understood what it means to live.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Here On My Own - Sweetbox

10:38 PM

She doesn't smile like me
She doesn't meake you weak
And she'll never know how to make you laugh
But she won't make you cry, she'll never break your heart like I used to
If you only knew all the words I couldn't say

When I close my eyes I see you
In my dreams you will be near
Won't let you disappear
But I'm here on my own
When I close my eyes and listen
I am crying out for you in the center of my heart
But I'm here on my own

You used to hear me breathe
When you touched me deep
Can you hear the sounds?
Can you feel the heat?
I was just too scared to let you own the deepest part of me
I've left paradise
And I did not even say goodbye

When I close my eyes I see you
In my dreams you will be near
Won't let you disappear
But I'm here on my own
When I close my eyes and listen
I am crying out for you in the center of my heart
But I'm here on my own
Ooooh baby

I think I'm over you
But it's not true
It's just a lie in a shade of blue
I think I'm over you
But it's not true
It's just a lie in a shade of blue

Saturday, April 11, 2009


10:01 PM

就让这首歌 今夜一直重复
我们都没错 只是看清楚 原来不懂的事
没有什么好说 现在先不要说
最后的拥抱 爱情的终点

回忆一触即发 如何忍住眼泪
不让她哭得唏哩哗啦 触景生情 这样好吗
身上留有你的 Tattoo
不怪现在 只怪当初
谁辜负了谁 糊涂 清醒了没
吃定了谁 电影散场了没
又怎么会虎头蛇尾 看你哭红又腫了双眼
一把眼泪 一把鼻涕
从戏剧变成默剧 怎么继续
只好放着这首歌 它一直 Repeat
曾经你是我的瘾 我们爱得这么过瘾
就像生命共同体 如今 却只能谢谢这回忆
电影散场之后 你是否留下了什么
一切不能再重头 那感伤的话别说
这决定并不轻松 夜深人静心会痛
有首歌它一直 Repeat
Repeat 是为了什么

是分手的时候 就让我们自由
回忆一幕幕就像一场电影 原来一直感动
电影终要结束 结束难免痛苦 心中留下伤痕
就让这首歌 萦绕在耳边

我尝试 刻画着每一次
这首歌要播几次 有太多的舍不得事
歌词像针在刺 旋律让眼眶湿
曾几何时 开始静止 打不开的画夹
从你哝我哝的梦 到现在你懂我懂的沉默
所有的痛 就让时间来破
电影散场之后 就在那回首处
少了骗人的拼图 怎么拼得出那版图
有没有那么一首歌 会让你很想念
有没有那么一首歌 你会假装听不见
听了又掉眼泪 却按不下停止键
多少的夜 就这样开着灯 到另一个夜
人不在 就让这首歌在 回忆也还在

就让这一首歌 今夜一直重复
我们都没错 只是看清楚 原来不懂的事
哦 没有什么好说 现在先不要说
最后的拥抱 爱情的终点

Friday, April 10, 2009


10:28 PM

Being on hiatus. Or not.

Maybe I shouldn't even reopen this blog, or I'll have to censor lots and lots of things :/

Haha. My final day of slacking before going straight out and giving my all :D

I hope this will be a fulfilling part of my life.

I realised.. I hate restrictions. I hate listening to people forcing me to do this and do that. Maybe I'm just spoilt, I probably am. But I'll do what I feel is best. I won't do things totally unreasonable. So just give me a reason to respect and believe, before you ask me for anything.

Respect. What is respect..? What can you do to gain that respect? A wonderful question to think about huh...?

Monday, April 06, 2009

Bubble Wrap

9:56 PM

I wish I could Bubble Wrap my heart,
Incase I fall and break apart,
I'm not God I can't change the stars,
And I don't know if there's life on Mars,
But I know you hurt,
The people that you love and those who care for you,
I want nothing to do with the things you're going through.
This is the last time,
I give up this heart of mine,
I'm telling you that I'm,
A broken man who's finally realised,
You're standing in moonlight,
But you're black on the inside,
Ooo oo oo ooo,
Do you think you ought to cry?
This is goodbye.
I'm a little dazed and confused,
Life's a bitch and so are you,
All my days have turned into nights,
Cos living without, without, without you in my life,
And you wrote the book on how to be a liar,
And lose all your friends,
Did I mean nothing at all?
Was I just another ghost that's been in your bed?
Cause this is the last time,
I give up this heart of mine,
I'm telling you that I'm,
A broken man who's finally realised,
You're standing in moonlight,
But you're black on the inside,
Ooo oo oo ooo,
Do you think you ought to cry?
This is goodbye.
Yeah! Turn on the radio honey,
Cause every single sad song you'll be able to relate!
Whoa oh! Don't get all emotional baby,
You never talk to me your unable to communicate!
This is the last time,
I give up this heart of mine,
I'm telling you that I'm,
A broken man who's finally realised...
This is the last time,
I give up this heart of mine,
I'm telling you that I'm,
A broken man who's finally realised,
You're standing in moonlight,
But you're black on the inside,
Ooo oo oo ooo,
Do you think you ought to cry?
This is goodbye.
This is Goodbye

Sunday, April 05, 2009


9:22 PM

It's so dark. I'm scared.

Saturday, April 04, 2009


11:56 PM

Well now, put up a smile and face the new day.

It'll all be over soon. 18 more days.

It's gonna be nonstop spamming now. Mon-Fri if possible :/

Just 18 more days of hard work. Let's work hard and get that GWH! :D

(I realised my ":D" smiley doesn't look nice cause of the anti-caps :/)

Over.. Or not?
10:33 PM

Just got home from SYF rehearsal at SCH.

It almost felt like SYF was over.. But if it were really over, I would be screaming and crying my eyes out instead of feeling all gooey with butterflies in my stomach.

When I stepped on stage, it almost felt like my whole body turned into jelly. It was only then I realised how nervous I actually was. I was shaking non stop and almost went into hyper-ventilation mode.

It got better after we started chan ge and I somehow managed to relax a little. But when lei bie started it was total panic. And when I heard jiechong's first note I almost broke down. Goshh..

It's a wonder how nerve wreaking it was to be on stage at that time, thinking it was SYF, hoping to be able to do your best. I hope SYF don't end up like this. If not I'll really jump into 黄河 and just kill myself.

Now.. I just hope my cough gets better.. My throat's killing me :/

2:36 AM

Maybe eating KFC was not that good an idea afterall... But nevermind, I had fun :D Haha!

It's nice to meet up once in awhile for dinner. And since today had practically gone wrong for me, so it's nice that this dinner could help me relax a little.

I swear I'll continue to go mad as long as I continue this. My life is going downhill T.T

Haha. Ok. No emo talks for me. Who know's what will happen next time.

One good news today.. I didn't fail my trigo test though I was like 101% sure I did.

But one bad news.. I could've gotten 2 grades up if I had 2 more mins to finish writing one question.

Oh well.. I'll do better next time. JIAYOU JIAYOU! :D

Thursday, April 02, 2009


10:08 PM

I'm obsessed over photography.

I swear I'm going to learn photography someday. And also to master the wonderful art of photoshopping. Haha!

Someday... SOMEDAY...!

Wednesday, April 01, 2009


9:05 PM

I've been waking up at 3+ to 4am so often recently. To mug, to do homework etc. I'm tired! =/

Going to do the same tomorrow, study my math! I'm getting super demoralized by math. I'm not imba enough to cope with so many things at once.. Zzz.. JIAYOU!

Dad was being random and started suggesting going to the dentist to do some whitening and to put braces.. Then my mum came in and started talking about cutting double eyelid.. Then she started contradicting herself by saying it's not good cause your eyelids sag when you're older then it'll look super fake. Then dad started talking about going to korea for a 'holiday' but instead going for plastic surgery.. Then mum started talking about breast enhancement. HAHA!

My parents are so hilarious :D And I just stood there, trying to hide my laughter while nodding my head.

Sunday, March 29, 2009


10:58 PM

路太弯 - 潘玮柏

我 在这里

眼 闭上眼

路太弯 梦在转
以为我 能习惯

路太弯 爱在转
我一路上 跌跌撞撞

呼吸太乱 世界太宽
我一路上 跌跌撞撞

Heard this song on MTV asia recently. Emo song T.T Made me feel like crying when I heard it.

12:45 AM

My ambition is...

To work in a japanese conveyer belt sushi stall so I can steal their sushi and have it for breakfast, lunch and dinner :D

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Sick once again

5:49 PM

It's been so long since I cried again. I guess everything just piled up too high. It feels so good to release it all out at once. I'll be better, I hope.

But now I'm really really seriously sick *sniff* I need more tissuee T.T

I'll never let another teardrop fall

Playlist: Happily Never After - Backstreet Boys

What's lost cannot be replaced. So to me, it doesn't matter cause buying something similar won't make a difference. I'm just being childish, but no one will understand.

100 reasons to curse
2:02 PM

And they're all the same.. T.T

Ok. That was random. I decided to skip posting about msia trips and such already. Pics are on facebook, so yah. That's all. HAHA.

I shouldn't have dinnered at macs ytd. Fries and ice-cream... It's killing my throat! Zzzz. But besides that, I don't mind dinnering. Heheh :D It's nice to dinner out once in a while!

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Country Life

8:37 PM

I feel so stressed these few days.. That's why I don't feel like wasting my energy to act all happy and positive anymore. I want to just be negative about everything.. I'm just not that strong afterall.

I can't get myself to sit down and just concentrate on studying. Everytime I start studying I'll start pacing around and find means and ways to get out of studying. I WANT to start studying now.. I NEED to start studying now. Zzzz..

My brain is just not functioning well. After being spammed tests after tests, school after school, CO after CO... I think it's normal I'm going crazy.

My goal in life is to lead a relaxed and easy-going life and to do things I actually feel it's worth it and enjoyable. (this doesn't mean sch and co is not fun of course :D)

So this busy and stress filled life is like so wrong.

I want to live in a countryside at some farm. With nice sceneries, with nature, with lots of adorable animals..

I want to live with no worries, no troubles...

That's like so impossible.. T.T

I should go to sleep and start dreaming now.. That's why sleep is so good :D HAHA!

Saturday, March 21, 2009


11:15 PM

I hate PW... I really really really hate PW...

I'm like crapping my way through sort of repeating the same nonsense again and again. And I think my campaign will be stupid and normal. Totally un-unique.

At least I'm done with the survey. Now my brain is bursting. I think I'm going to fall sick soon. I feel super unwell T.T

12:30 PM

Malaysia trip was so fun. But I can't post about it now cause I'm loaded with work ><

So here's a reminder to myself on what I'm suppose to post after I finish what I need to do.

Hmm.. OVERSEAS TRIP! Food project day + Guanyue gathering :D

OK. Now time to spam people again..

All help would be greatly appreciated :D

HAHA! I feel so evil spamming everyone. But some Dunmanians are just too adorable and gave me super cute answers which almost made me LOL and fall off my chair :D

Saturday, March 14, 2009


12:07 AM

*starts singing*

Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to mummy :D

I'm sorry for not being able to spend our birthdays together again

This will be my last post before I leave. But at least I spammed quite a lot of posts recently to fill in for these 5 days.

Byebye world. I shall spend my lonely birthday on the bus tomorrow.

I feel old :/

Friday, March 13, 2009


10:35 PM

Hmm. I feel so jealous sometimes I think I'm so immature :/

Jealousy? Or is it envy? So sinful! Hahah!

*off to pack*

Holy Day
10:26 PM

Tomorrow is a holy day :D

Tomorrow is white day 白色情人节!

Hahah! I haven't finish packing :/ And I'm still procrastinating here. And because my bro's back late I can't cut my cake yet T.T

THANKS TO EVERYONE TODAY! And thanks for that ADORABLE giraffe that has a super spastic face and doesn't really look like a giraffe. And of course thanks to my DARLINGS for that puzzle :D I took some time to piece it up and haha! Your message was hmm :D

I'll be off tomorrow already. My poor phone will be like rotting and my comp will have a long rest. I'm such a geeeeeek :P

10:24 PM

Thursday, March 12, 2009


11:15 PM

YES! Everything's over and done with. Now it's up to fate to decide my predicament.

I hope lady luck is with me

I was so nervous I was practically ignoring everyone around me. And when I finally walked out of the examination room with a horribly goofy smile on my face, my mum was commenting that "you finally smiled!" Haha! And it wasn't because I did exceptionally well (cause I know I didn't). It was because it's finally over!

*clap* I feel like I just dropped a 1000000 (till infinity) kg load off my shoulders :D

Somehow, my brother unknowingly treated me to a cup of mocha frappe and we then took a taxi home while my mum went off to find my dad. And of course, my brother paid more since he's always loaded. So I ended up only spending $4 out of the total $11+ of the trip.

I seriously wonder what's wrong with my phone.. Sometimes people just don't receive the message I sent out. And I'm quite sure I sent it cause it's shown in my phone.. Luckily it doesn't happen often T.T

And I finally got a new camera! Sony K77, was it? Even though it's like pink.. Haha! But it's the metallic purple-lish kind of pink. Not the baby pink which will be like super bimbo-tic for me (no offence T.T I like baby pink too, but not too much of it). I can't wait to explore it tomorrow! :D

9:22 AM

2 hours + more till dooms day...


Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Happy and Emo

9:50 PM

I'm so happy. My juniors are growing up :D I'm so proud of you all! Haha! Good luck for 泪别阳关 new version tomorrow. It's quite sad I can't hear it cause I'm not going :/

Physics test tmr! Haven't study finish =.=

But for now.. Piano is more important!

36 hours+ more to go.

Sunday, March 08, 2009


10:57 PM

Tomorrow will be the first time I go to school so late on monday (:

I've been thinking.. What if, what if, what if.. Maybe, maybe, maybe..

I really really hate these words. Why can't something ever be certain? I'm scared..

I hate to say this, but I'm not sure if I'll make it or not. Judging from today, I don't think I can adapt that fast. Will I be lucky that day? Maybe, maybe not. See? It's maybe again.

Luck.. It's partly about luck. I'm no genius, I know that.

Maybe it's 20% luck and 80% hardwork. What if I have zero luck. What if my hard work could only bring me that far, a 50% at most. One slip and I'll fall.. One slip..

I really don't want to be so negative! Arghh..

I'm really very scared.

8:42 PM

I have so many things to do, but zero motivation.

Spamming 手放开 and 情歌 now. Gosh, I'm so fickle :/ Haha.

At least my ':/' doesn't look weird here -.-

I like 手放开. Everytime I listen to that I feel like crying. It's just so touching. I think you really have to be very strong to be able to let someone go.


You know. I really have alot of work left.. Noooo!

Went for ACE project today. And ended up just doing research and discussing a bit about our creative presentation. It's super interesting :D It's about..



Hahah! Ok. I'm zi-highing again :/

I shall hurry go off and start doing my homework and STUDY.. Oh yes.. I forgot there's 2 test to study for...

Oh no no no no no..

Saturday, March 07, 2009


3:17 PM

我的宝贝 宝贝 要如何爱你
爱到底 伤到底 还不分离
爱上 对手 尝尽委屈

哦 爱是一出戏
拿心撑住你 拿梦圈住我

哦 葬了多少心
为你演情戏 答案全是戏
There’s something waiting for me (日子充满杀气)

无奈 无力 无语

我的宝贝 宝贝 要如何爱你
爱到底 伤到底 还不分离
爱上 对手 尝尽委屈
我怎会死心塌地 (怎么会死心塌地 check)

竞争对手 牵着我的手
不要都不说 不要都不做
不要千言万语 彻底到寂寞
秘密会开花 嫉妒会结果
瞬移的转弯 爱情的深夜

竞争对手 怎么才放手
眼泪在颤抖 拳头在软弱
好胜的决心 怕输的易感
无情不会寄托 滥情会犯错
走错方向更会坠落 (看不到那些回忆)

无奈 无力 无语 (看不到那些回忆)

我的宝贝 宝贝 要如何爱你
爱到底 伤到底 还不分离 (怎么它还不分离)
爱上 对手 尝尽委屈
我怎会死心塌地 (怎么会死心塌地)

我的宝贝 宝贝 要如何爱你
爱到底 伤到底 还不分离 (怎么都还不放弃)
碰上 对手 才会着迷
你不要转身离去 (你是个竞争对手)

It's like the first time I'm looping 王力宏's songs. But it's just so addictive. Sounds like some jazzy/blues/rap song. Haha. I like the rap part best though.

2:39 PM

5 more days to go.

I'm tired. I'm not me anymore. I don't know what to do :/

5 more days...

I can't believe it's so soon. I don't want to have to cry again. But somehow I always have this feeling that I'm not trying my best.

I tried to smile, I tried not to think about it. But you can only do that much.

When you're alone, you just can't help but think about it. I guess it will never stop haunting me again and again.

3 consecutive nights of crying.. Please don't let it happen again..

Maybe I'm not living up to expectations.

I don't want you to see me like this..

Friday, March 06, 2009

Good Luck

10:11 PM

Good luck to all the poor souls who officially became "saikang warriors" today. And most importantly, being under YIQI and JIANMING. I feel happy. In my 3 years of overseas trip with CO, I've never lived the life of a saikang warrior before :D

Oh well, good luck to yiqi and jianming! LOL! And also to CLAR who had like the worst job of all.

Haix.. I just found out that SYF is like seriously super soon. Or maybe, I was trying to avoid that FACT. Probably wasn't listening when they announced the date. But oh well..

22 APRIL 2009

And according to yiliang, ngee ann is right after us. Haha! GOOD LUCK TO THOSE EZ NGEE ANN PEOPLE! Hopefully our imba music will motivate you :D Haha.

Apparantly 7th May is not only CHUIDA DAY! But it's also yiliang's birthday. HAHAH! So coincidence ><

edit/ 7th May is also kuanliang's birthday. HAHAH! It's a birthday for liangs :D

Gongyan sort of reminded me of some of the EZ people.

Thanks junguang for coming :D
No thanks to jieheng who FORGOTTEN to buy tickets! Hahaa! Joke :P
And jarratt who couldn't get tickets
And yiliang who wasn't free
And the girls whom I don't know if they came or not :/

I MISS EZCO! Haha! I want some ezcogy outing :D Woohooo!

Zomg. I'm zi-highing again.

Today was actually a horribly emo day :/ I have split personality...

Thursday, March 05, 2009


9:47 PM

Hmm. I'm sleepy today..

I wonder if gongyan was really good enough :/

泪别阳关... It was much better during the rehearsal. Makes me so worried >< And of course, I made mistakes too. GOSH I FEEL LIKE KILLING MYSELF..

Oh well.. Then it was over...

黄河之水天上来... I don't really know what to say about this. I actually missed a note! I hope it wasn't so obvious, since daniel was also blowing.. :/ At least I think I wasn't as nervous as during the rehearsal.

I was emo-ing then cause of leibie.. And I guess it distracted me from worrying about the audience.

But I'm happy people actually thought it was good :D Guo lao shi even came to shake hands with me and daniel -.- Haha. I was super high then :D

Next was 茉莉花 and 东海渔歌.

I think those 2 were still OK in a sense. HAHA. At least our 音准 problem wasn't as bad as during rehearsal.

I really hope I didn't disappoint anyone that day. I know I was super disappointed with myself cause of 泪别. But ohhh nvmm. 加油了!

I found out about lots of interesting things today.. I have lots of scandalous seniors :D


Talking to eunice lee about 'the future' now. HAHA. We really really MUST go overseas together next time! Maybe gather a few more people if possible and go to EUROPE together (:

I hope this plan won't just be like something you say and forget about ><

It'll be so fun going overseas together! Hahaha!

Monday, March 02, 2009


10:51 PM

I feel guilty for thinking such things. For thinking this way.

Maybe I'm wrong, maybe I'm just afriad.. I hope it's just that.

I feel bad. I feel evil.. I don't deserve any of this..


And it's back to studying again..

Sunday, March 01, 2009


10:36 PM

Taking a break from history now. I seriously don't like the Kaiser now. Why did you have to exist!

Was playing around with superpoke just now. Haha. And something very amusing happened.

I was randomly clicking around and ended up giving a restraining order to everyone on my friend's list. Including eunice lee... Hahaha.

Then it ended up as...

Restraining order -> Throw a shoe -> Hug a tree together -> Become absolutely fabulous with -> GET MARRIED -> Kiss -> Cuddle -> Become BFFs -> Smile at -> Flirt with -> Have a slumber party with

HAHA! If you don't get it.. The red ones are sent by me. Hahah. Somehow I wonder how this will continue. xD

Ok.. Back to getting murdered by the Kaiser...

It's amazing to be able to torture millions of children and even adults after your death.

Tired and Uninspired
7:53 PM

My new skin says it all..

It was screwed up in IE I had to re-edit it anyway. So if it screws up anywhere else? Not my problem. Haha.

And the tagboard's down too. For now.. It's kind of pointless having a tagboard anyway :/

I feel AP now. History is again driving me crazy. I feel like not handing it up... To just heck care about it. Oh well.. School won't end just because of this.. 4 hours 4 mins left of Sunday...

So many things to worry about now. My head's going to go 'BOOM!'.

Good luck and good luck again..

我好想跳进黄河淹死算了 T.T

Friday, February 27, 2009


10:54 PM

Went out for dinner at NYNY again. This time with the eunices (tan and lee), linda and YIHUI (amazingly..). I swear everytime we meet up we make lots and lots of noise. It just somehow happens. Last time it was just yihui, eunices and I. Now with linda? More noise!

Did quite some catching up today. Hopefully we'll successfully keep our dates (once per month dinner-ing after CCA!). Haha. It feels so fun and carefree just dinner-ing out like that. But our lives catches up with us when it all ends. And it's back to our boring and mundane lives doing the same thing over and over again.

Wake up. Go to school. Study. CCA. Go home. Do work. Slack off but do nothing. Sleep. (multipled by infinity)

There's always too little time. And so many things to do..

I don't think I can do it. It's not that I don't believe in myself or others.. It's just logical thinking. That's how things are right now. I don't know what else I can do to help anymore. I'm tired.

There's so many things I have to get done. But I don't know where to start and how to get it done. It's just piling up and up and up. I swear I'm going to go crazy one day. Or I'll die of exhaustion or something.

I'm just not as strong as I should be.

Now all I can do is take it one at a time. I feel bad always handing things up late and all. But.. Maybe I'm just procrastinating and these are all excuses.

Oh well. Life was never interesting anyways.

Thursday, February 26, 2009


10:41 PM

I'm a happy person. I think.

I want people ESPECIALLY my friends to be happy too. This I'm sure of.

I'm so amused by the current OBSESSION over a certain... by certain..... HAHA. I just don't get it really xD This is too hilarious and fun to watch.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

P.S. 我爱你

9:31 PM

把最美的風景 收進你的心中
好讓我 從現在到以後
佔有你溫柔 一刻不放過



只要你記得 我們那麼愛過

怕未來 快樂變得貴重
要是少了我 你有多寂寞



只要你記得 我們那麼愛過

我會在不同的窗口 給你擁抱


只要你記得 我們那麼愛過

我忘不掉 你第一次吻我

8:56 PM

My stamina is running out.

This tired-ness is just accumulating non-stop day by day.

But I'll get over it. I promise, I swear.

I'll drive it away, get it out of my sight.

It'll be over soon.. Someday, one day..

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Thank you

10:14 PM

I feel like I'm going to make some speech before I die. But I guess that's half true.

To that few (you know who you are..)

Thank you for the help you gave me tonight.
Thank you for understanding.
Thank you for comforting me.
Thank you for trying to cheer me up.
Thank you for encouraging me.
Thank you for listening to me.
Thank you for being there for me.

This is my problem, so it's okay, you don't need to do anything about it. I'm just glad that you're there. I'm so touched I feel like crying now. But.. I'LL STAY STRONG!

・・ Songjia is a stupid girl blexxx ··· ````` ℡ mч.ъēs+.íǒvē・・ says:

the first part is like dawn in the forest
then happily play 22
then the
behind part is moth became butterfly

It may seem pointless.. But at least it made me LOL (:

It'll all get better in time..

Sunday, February 22, 2009


11:48 PM

I'm a survey freak. Never once am I able to resist the temptation to try one.. xD

001. Real name → Chong Yi Jing
002. Nickname(s)→ Ermm. Jing jing? HAHA
004. Zodiac sign → pisces!
005. Male or female → female
006. Elementary → some PAP
007. Middle School → White Sands Primary School
008. High School → Dunman High School
010. Hair color → Black
011. Long or short → Long I guess..
012. Loud or Quiet → Quiet xD (ignores what others say)
013. Sweats or Jeans → Jeans
014. Phone or Camera → CAMERA PHONE!
015. Health freak → health is below my list of worries.
016. Drink or Smoke? → NEVER!
017. Do you have a crush on someone? → HMMM...
018. Eat or Drink → drink xD
019. Piercings → 1 on each ear
020. Tattoos → Nope.

023. First piercing → (I have no idea why it suddenly jumped to 23) Long long ago..
026. First crush → Primary 3 or 4. I fell in love with this adorable little humongous husky.
027. First pet → My pet goldfish which I buried it downstairs T.T
030. First big birthday → I forgot.. When I was a baby?

049. Eating → Naahh. It's what time already..
050. Drinking → Nope.
052. I'm about to → GO AND SLEEP!
053. Listening to → Silence...
054. Plans for today → Finish this quiz in my last 4 mins of today.
055. Waiting for → BEDTIME!

058. Want kids? → Of course (:
059. Want to get married? → Yeah duhh..
060. Careers in mind → Vet or anything medicine related
068. Lips or eyes → eyes!
070. Shorter or taller? → grow taller!
072. Romantic or spontaneous → Both?
073. Nice stomach or nice arms → BOTH??
074. Sensitive or loud → Definitely sensitive (:
075. Hook-up or relationship → relationship -.-
076. Trouble maker or hesitant → trouble maker!

080. Lost glasses/contacts → Never ever.
081. Ran away from home → nope -.-
082. Held a gun/knife for self defense → I held a knife. To defend myself from onions and potatoes..
083. Killed somebody → mosquitoes and ants.
084. Broken someone's heart → I hope not ><
087. Cried when someone died → Definitely T.T

089. Yourself → Most of the time, no ):
090. Miracles → Hopefully ><
091. Love at first sight → Nope, definitely no.
092. Heaven → Nope.
093. Santa Claus → Never in my life -.-
094. Sex on the first date → Way out of the question -.-
095. Kiss on the first date → I don't think so.. =/

097. Is there one person you want to be with right now → Santa claus! -.- Hmm.. Maybe, I think, I guess.. Yeah xD
098. Are you seriously happy with where you are in life → Not really. But nothing is perfect right? (: I'll get there... Someday!
099. Do you believe in God → Nope..
100. Post as 100 truths and tag 20 people → Errmm -.- No?

10:19 PM

We were practically lying down to take this photo xD

Group photo! Haha. Love you guys girls.

I feel so fortunate to have such pretty and nice friends :D

JYM <3
9:54 PM

Outing with JYM today was amazing. It was part present shopping and part dinner/photo-taking session. Haha.

Present shopping turned out quite successful, and we bought this super adorable 'moody' bag from some cute shop at marina square. Then ended up having to burn at least 1 hour walking around waiting for marinah to come. Quite amazing.. We went to marina square to buy marinah's present (: I saw so many adorable things at marinah square. Got to save money and start buying stuff for myself again soon. HAHA

Then after we finally met up, we decided to go NYNY to eat. Found some 'HOLE' to sit in. Haha. It's super cool, like a small (or not so small) compartment to sit in. I ended up not finishing my food.. It was really filling!

The pictures are in no order >< Cause I'm lazy to arrange it now. Haha. And I'll post somemore after I got the pics from Jayce and MM's camera (:

Our '08 presents kept till now. For me and MM aka Marinah Musa. HAHA. Thanks JAYCE for wrapping it so nicely and all :D

Marinah hiding from the world ><

There she is! Birthday girl! Even tho your birthday is still 2 days away ><

Jayce being all adorable and spastic again (:

She's attempting to kiss her food... Nahh. Haha

On our way home. I took 8 spastic shots with 8 different expressions. Hahah. This is just one of the many xD

JYM! Actually.. It becomes MYJ =.=

Ermm. Random photo? Haha!

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Happy Birthday Bro!

10:33 PM

I shall start by posting some pictures first.. TADA! Congratulations xD

You may not be able to read the contents. But that's fine! xD

The groom's failure attempts to run away. *shakes head* He got caught by the pastor.

A change in mood. MY BEAUTIFUL RUBY! You are so pretty (:

And last but not least. My parents and brother (again with his spastic expressions)
I wish you a very happy birthday dear brother! Even though you'll never see this.. HAHA. 17 years old already, and finally back into a mixed school after 4 years in VS. Who knows what will happen, Hehehe xD
My birthday wish for you... Stop being a 宅男 and step out of the house! That'll be more than enough (:

Wednesday, February 18, 2009


8:11 PM

Happy birthday my darling but sometimes paedophilic and baichiSMART friend LINDA :D

Don't even know if you'll see this, but...



Happy birthday to you~~
Happy birthday to you~~
Happy birthday to LINDA~~
Happy birthday to you~~!

Tuesday, February 17, 2009


9:49 PM

Super nice lyrics and songs. Haha. And because I obviously can't read or understand the jap lyrics, here's the eng meaning. xD

Papermoon - Tommy Heavenly6

I'm falling down into my shadow
Your breath is hidden
Wait for me deadly night
Don't be scared

The presence of your smile amongst the flowering trees is reflected into your gaze
See you in your dreams, yeah baby
As for those nightmares
For your sake, fairy blue
I want to smash it and display it for all to see, that black paper moon
Because you gave me the belief in myself
When you're lost, here I am, forever with your soul
When I glance upwards, you glisten like the moon

That sweet scarlet jam in that ensnaring garden raises it to the surface
Your destiny, the kind of world that you would desire
Grasp it with those hands, no evil deed shall be done, nobody will be scared again

Fairy blue, you have given me the reason why I live on
A bond that is eternal
Because you sent for me, I will find you, my dear, no matter where you go
Now that you grasp it tightly, don't let that moment slip

Don't believe in anyone, oppression and time always exist
So then your words will always be in my heart, day after day

For your sake, fairy blue, I want to crush and display for all to see, that mark
Stop getting lost in those dreams
I want to escape with that moment

Fairy blue, you have given me the reason why I live on
A bond which I trust
You're not alone
When you're lost, here I am, forever with your soul
I'll be struggling along with you, trust me

8:47 PM

[and now you're here.] says:
eh sorry lor. mine's not
fast and furious hor.
mine's errr.

Haha Jiamin, your quotes are just adorable xD Let's 加油 and make mission impossible, POSSIBLE! (:

Chemistry over
8:01 PM

Chemistry is over. I feel more free now.

Now left to study for physics pop quiz and do abit of homework. And then there's LA journal on friday. And I heard of a 1000 word history essay again.

Wow.. So freeeeee... *sarcasm*

And then there's a XZZ meeting tmr for who knows what. At least no more chuida. HAHA.

The good thing is...